The 2010 Finish Line

I am pulling out of the PATAFA Weekly Relays 110m high hurdles race this 4 Dec 2010. A confluence of factors influenced my decision. A week ago, I wrote about my slim chances of competing in the hurdles again this year. After much contemplation, I can say for a fact that I am ill-prepared. The strong desire for a hurdles comeback fueled my determination to make it in time for the 4th of December.

Although I admit that, at first, I was terribly scared at the prospect of competing over senior hurdles, that fear diminished dramatically once I started clearing the actual 1.067m-high barriers last week. With my years of experience and an uninterrupted 2-week phase leading up to the day, finishing the race would be a sure cinch.

But then again, I did not come out of retirement just to compete. To compete for the sake of competing is beneath me. At this stage in my life where questions seem never-ending, athletics is one of the few oases of certainty. Whilst on the track, I leave the troubles of quarter-life, of my career-search and an ongoing tempest in my family life behind for just a moment.

If my main event does not involve sprinting at full speed over those barriers, competing would be a lot easier. But the hurdles is both a technical and a sprinting event. Injuries can happen if one competes ill-prepared.

I am not making excuses. I am no longer afraid of racing again. I just don’t want a mediocre performance in the event that I love.

The words of my high school coach Ed Sediego becomes ever so true considering my circumstances: “It takes time to cook good food.”

I’ll end the 2010 season by running the 100m dash this 11 Dec 2010.

It has been nearly 10 months since I brushed off the cobwebs of retirement. The experience has been quite a roller coaster ride. Despite the many disappointments of the past months, I’m happy to be back in my element again.Whilst stuck in the dreary routine of my 2-year retirement, I never expected myself to experience the sheer joy hurdling again. I am thankful for this second chance.

17 days are left before I wrap up everything. The 2011 athletics season beckons!

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